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Tuesday night davefish came round for dinner, and seemed to enjoy it, particularly the rather-delayed orange sorbet (I started making it too late in the day, and it wasn't entirely set by the time we finished the first course. But it didn't really matter; we chatted a bit, and began to watch Chasing Amy, and then had the sorbet). DM had also helpfully printed out my article, which I sent off yesterday, along with a copy of my thesis, to the guy at OUP. I do hope he likes it!
My parents seem to be engaging more with the idea of us getting married - they've said they'll organize a cake, and my dad said he had loads of leftover air miles which we could use for our honeymoon. My mother even offered me her own wedding dress, a 60s designer number, which was a kind thought, though I have to say I had a slightly different idea of what I was planning to wear. We've made more plans for the reception; basically things seem to be coming together a bit more.
We'll be in London on Saturday, but not actually for the Anti-War march, which many of my friends, from both goth and geek circles, seem to be planning on attending. We'll be seeing my aunt Chris in Kew Gardens first (which should neatly sidestep the issue of her numerous feral dogs) and later, we'll go to Islington to see G's aunt Val. Then meet up with Doogle for Slimelight, and probably hang around with him for a while on Sunday too (if we're not too wiped out by then!).
Today I shall do some laundry, buy some fruit and veg at the market, and go to the UL.

(no subject)

I am not sure what to do. My father rang this afternoon (very unusual for him) to talk about giving us his spare air miles for the honeymoon. Like I said before, they've both suddenly started being very nice and helpful and generous about the wedding. I even managed to extract from my father today some small hint as to what their original objection to G was (he said that when they first met him in March, he looked "unkempt" and "talked of strange things" (guns, mostly)). That's not my problem. Rather, he said today, "Isn't there something else you want to ask me to do?" I said, "Um, I don't think so." "Don't you want me to give you away?"
And this is the thing. When he said that, I said, "I guess, if you want." And he said, "Well, I definitely don't want anyone else to do it!" I said, "I was kind of thinking of just going in on my own, you know." "Oh no, I'll do it, of course." "Um, ok, if you want to."
But when he rang off I found I felt very uncomfortable about the idea. It's not really that we've been on quite bad terms about this whole marriage thing for the last few months; I suspect I would feel rather uneasy about being "given away" even if they'd both been ecstatic about G from the word go. I'm not quite sure what it is. Maybe it just seems antiquated, or unfeminist, or something. I really feel I'd rather just walk in on my own terms - it is _me_ getting married, after all; it is _my_decision_, and not something arranged by my father, for heaven's sake! And how can he "give me away" when I've been supporting myself for years anyway?
So, like I say, I feel troubled about the idea. But it may well really offend my dad to say this to him, especially since I already said yes, and especially since he's suddenly being all generous and offering us lots of help with the wedding. And in effect, it's just a tradition, like wearing rings or having a best man or throwing confetti - it doesn't have to really _mean_ anything. It's not as though our ceremony text will contain any reference to "Who giveth this woman...?" anyway.
Still, we haven't felt especially bound by other traditions. We aren't getting married in a church, since we aren't religious; we both got each other engagement rings; I certainly shan't be promising to obey G :-)
Oh, this thing goes round and round in my head. I suspect in the end I shall tell my father I'd rather walk up the aisle (well, gangway, really, in the Registry Office) on my own.